WELL IT'S THE MIDDLE OF JANUARY AND I HAVE BEEN
BURRIED UNDER A MOUND OF NEVER ENDING SNOW. ON TOP OF THAT
OUR NORMAL ALBERTAN BLUE SKIES HAVE BEEN A BLEAK GREY AND THAT
IS REFLECTIVE OF HOW I FEEL! BEING HOUSE BOUND BECAUSE THE WEATHER
IS TOO COLD TO BE OUT IN AND THE ROADS TO HAZARDOUS TO DRIVE CERTAINLY
CAUSE ONE TO BE BOTH CREATIVE AND CONTEMPLATIVE.
AS I SPEND A GREAT DEAL OF MY TIME ALONE I HAVE ALL THE TIME I NEED
TO THINK ON THE JOURNEY OF LIFE THAT I AM CURRENTLY LIVING. THE INTERNAL
HERMET IS QUIET HAPPY AS MY CAVE IS REALLY COMFORTABLE AND I WANT FOR NOTHING, SOLITUDE IS MINE FOR THE TAKING. THE HELPER AND HEALER WITHIN IS
FULL OF APPREHENSION AS SHE WONDERS WHO HAS ANY NEED OF HER AT ALL! AS DOORS STAY FIRMLY SHUT AT THIS TIME. THE MYSITIC IN ME BELIEVES THAT EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A PURPOSE AND THAT ALL WILL BE WELL JUST KEEP BELIEF AND POSITIVITY GOING.
SOME DAYS THAT IS FAR EASY TO DO THAN OTHERS.
I KNOW IN MANY PAST LIVES I HAVE LEAD A ISOLATED EXISITANCE, WHETHER CHOICE OR CURCUMSTANCE
SO I KNOW THAT IN THIS LIFE AT THIS TIME IT IS A COMBINATION OF BOTH AND THAT I AM SURROUNDED BY PEOPLE WHO BOTH CARE AND LOVE ME. MY CURRENT JOURNEY IS ONE OF SELF DISCOVERY, OF BEING LOVING AND COMPASSIONATE TO MY SELF OF STOPPING DESTRUCTIVE HABITS AND TRYING TO BECOME OK WITH THE PATH I AM ON VERSES THE PATH I THINK I SHOULD BE ON. THE MIND IS BOTH FABULOUS AND SELF DELUSIONAL. LIVING IN THIS MOMENT AND NOT CREATING A SELF FANTACY IS HARD GOING. BEING OK WITH INACTIVITY AND NON ACHIEVEMANT IS A WORK IN PROGRESS.
BEING ALONE- MOSTLY I AM FINE WITH THAT- BUT WHEN YOU ARE PLACED IN A SITUATION THAT YOU NEED SUPPORT AND ALL OF THAT SUPPORT IS HUNDREDS OF MILES AWAY - THAT IS A TEST OF BELIEF. THE UNIVERSE PROVIDED A STRANGER FOR ME TO GIVE ME AID AND COMPASSION SO THANK YOU I KNOW I AM NOT TRUELY WITHOUT SUPPORT BUT THE FEELINGS OF HELPLESSNESS OVER WHELM AND LONELINESS CAN BE HARD TO DEAL WITH.....AS WITHIN IS REFLECTIVE OF MOTHER NATURE - DORMANT AND GREY AS WINTER IS NOW...I KNOW THAT SPRING WILL BRING THRAW AND ALLOW LIFE TO BLOOM ONCE MORE; SO SHALL I! AND HOPE THAT EACH SMALL TEST BRINGS ME CLOSER TO THE PERSON I WANT TO BE, ONE THAT CAN FLOW WITH EASY AND ALLOW BRIGHTNESS TO SHINE AND ALWAYS WILL THRIVE.
BLESSINGS BE
DEBRA RAE
