Charity Rant

I am bombarded during the Christmas Season with charitable demands, they come via the post and email and there is always the stands in every mall. I have the charities that I always give to and have done for years, these organisations are ones that I have done my research on and feel comfortable that the money I give is actually going to people in need. The issue I have with the Christmas demands is that many only give at this time of year and to me the need is year round. I would much rather know that people are being helped through out the year. There seems to be so many agencies around at Christmas, and to my way of seeing things a lot of families in need are given amble at this time, but are left without much after that. It seems to me that we - and charities- embrace the commercialism of the season, the need for excess. One present, that is not enough the tree has to be loaded. Now if we took all the money donated over the season and then broke it down and gave it over the year to those in need, I really feel it would do so much more good.
I am so concerned about where money to charities goes. My awareness and concerns where raised after Hurricane Katrina, billions of dollars were raised and given to organisations but still money was not made available to those in need. Where did it go, all that money. I found a site that showed the amount of money that was being paid to staff and C.E.O s and to advertising and incentives ect ect ect  and also to my shock I found that just because I donated money to a certain cause the charity did not have to give that money to that cause, they could use it as they wished. My biggest shock was that one of the major agencies at fault was one of the best known. But do not take my word for it, please do your own research.
There is so much need in this world and so many agencies that claim to give it, with all the money being donated yearly really there should not be any poverty. There are a lot of very rich people out there who are rich because of donations. Makes me both sad and extremely mad. My only solution is to be very careful with whom I give my money to. I check and re-check and then I hope that I am making a difference. Unfortunately charities are big business as are most medical fund raising groups. The bigger they get the more money needs to be raised just to keep the infrastructure going. I once read that out of every dollar raised 1 cent went to the cause, now how sad is that.
My bottom line with this rant is please if you donate, check out that your money is mainly going where you think it is; maximize your donation. I know that I did and so when I open my wallet it is doing the good I hoped it would.

Love and Light
Debra Rae

Happy Christmas

What does Christmas mean to you? Is it a time of fun, family and joy or is it a time of expense and dread and you are glad when the season is over and done with? It is sad that the later is the most common response. In my mind it is time to create a change, to take the stress out of season and put the fun back in to it.
My basic rules are : Be OK with simplicity. If you do not like to put up a houseful of decorations and it is left up to you, then don't. If you get complaints then let them know if they wish more they have to do it.
                              : Be OK with only buying for immediate family if that is what you wish to do and set a price limit on it. Budget for your Christmas, it is great to see the bigger box store re-introducing lay-away, so that you do not have to use your credit cards and have time to pay for your gifts.
                              : Be Wise as gifts are brief and it is not things that are remembered down the roads of time, it is the experience. So do not give into emotional blackmail to overspend if you cannot do so or if you do not want to.
                             : Be a Delegator. If it is Christmas at your house and you are expecting a lot of people then ask them to bring a dish with them. In our family the host provides the turkey and everyone else brings the trimmings.
                            : Be Available. Have fun at Christmas again give others a job so that you are not always the one running around- this is family- treat them that way and not like the occasional quest.
                            : Set up holiday memories now that your family will remember for the future. In my home my grown children still like our traditions of opening one gift Christmas Eve, driving around to look at all the lights and having their dad make eggs benedict for Christmas morning.
                             : Remember what the occasion is about, whether you are religious or not celebrate the reason for Christmas which is the birth of Christ and peace on earth and good will to man. Be nice, be charitable and do not give in to the need to over spend.
                               : Have FUN!

Have a wondrous Christmas this year and remember it is about family not money spent or presents under the tree. Free yourself from the need to over extend yourself emotionally and financially and bring back the inner joy of being available to the simplicity of the moments that make this a special day.
Peace on Earth and Good Will to All Men and Women and Children, not only on Christmas Day but for always!

Namaste
Debra Rae

Being Me

I find that there are many blessings to being in your fifties. For me it was the return of my Australian-ism's. After spending almost half my adult life in Canada where I had to modify my outspoken bluntness because it was viewed as rude or offensive and my affectionate nature (love to hug and touch people) which was perceived as being sexual or again offensive; it was a relief to wake up one morning and have the realisation that "Life is to short to be who you are not". I am proudly Australian as well as a Canadian through choice, but I was choosing to be only Canadian because it was the easier of things to do to 'fit in'. How I dislike that term! Do not say this or that do not be this or that. I actually find it funny that most new immigrants are encouraged to keep their heritage in this the country of integrations, but those of us who are white and English speaking are not given that same privilege. Now I know in someway, someone will take that as me being racist. I say to you this is HOW I FOUND IT TO BE, this is my REALITY
and quite frankly I am F***ing tired of being told what and how to say what is on my mind because someone else may be offended. WHAT ABOUT ME! Am I not entitled as it seems everyone else of other origin is to have my heritage and  feelings honored.
When I turned 50, I also re-connected with myself. Spiritual, physically and emotionally. I came to the realisation that I am entitled to be ME. Good, bad or ugly. It is ironic that Canada achieved what my parents could not, the ability to silence me in a lot of ways. No longer and no more is my motto now. I am who I am, whether you like it or not really does not concern me anymore because having my voice and speaking my truth is a really important part of who I am. Allowing myself to be open and affectionate is also who I am. I now do not allow the judgement holders the ability to control me any longer. I am lucky that I now am in the position that I do not need the approval of a employer or any other system to tell me how or who I should be. Amazing the cycle's we can repeat without us realising it. I spent a lot of time us a child fighting for my voice and my nature and then moved to another country and culture that did just that stopped both in such a insidious way that I did not even realise how much it had happened until I went back to Australia after 13 years of being away. I was so polite in comparison to every one else, so worried about offending with a blunt or truthful statement. But at the same time I realised I had lost that sense of freedom and joy of just being honest and being me. Now please, I am not being a downer on Canada, I love this country it is an amazing place. This is about the power of being a new-be  and trying to fit in, by not placing enough importance on being You. My fifties are my rediscovery times, the relief of being me times, the who cares what others thinks time, my get of the pot and be and do times. My realisation that most likely half my life is over, so what am I waiting for, who am I waiting for. Embracing who you are with an open heart and mind is so freeing I have to wonder why I allowed myself to be side tracked away from what my much younger self fought for. Maybe it was so that when I came full circle I would do so with maturity to appreciate those aspects of myself, to not take them for granted and to except it is finally great to be ME.
Take a moment and ask yourself, "Am I being me. Am I holding back and if so why" and if you are please do yourself a favour and release the leash and embrace you. You are a beautiful reflection of the creator, foibles and all.


Just a thought
Love and light
Debra Rae

Gratefulness

G is for generating the energy
R is for being real and allowing false thoughts to be released
A is for your actions that speak louder than words
T is for tenderness as you go forth into your day
E is for your excitement of living life well
F is for faith that adds dimensions
U is for unity of mind/body and soul
L is for love, for yourself and others
N is for being a nurturer of ideas and hope
E is for enjoyment of living a life with joy
S is for Self and understand your role
S is for success and understanding gratitude

Step into your day with gratefulness in your heart and mind and you will find that the little things that use to plague you are no longer present and that joy and laughter and love will be there too guide you more readily. Take a positive step and write or think of all the things that you are grateful for every day; the list needs not to be long but needs to be real.

Namaste
Love and Light
Debra Rae

Positive verses negative messaging

I wish that the general media would broadcast more 'feel good' stories, because I know that there are legions of people in this vast world of ours who are making a difference. I know that as I write, some body out there is offering a helping hand, giving to a charity, working with the many organizations and groups we have or just helping a family member or friend. I choose to believe that given the choice, most people would step up and aide their fellow man.
Now you would not know that from the media reports that supply us information 24/7. All we see is the bad and the ugly, with a occasional celeb story thrown in for relief or the latest Internet craze. It is no wonder many are feeling hopeless and over whelmed, with a sense that this world we live in is on a path to destruction. Wars and domestic upheaval with a dash of economic doom and toss that with a taste of climatic disaster's and what are we left with? a feeling of hopelessness.
I am a cynic in many ways, as it is my belief that we are feed this continual feeding of negativity so that we (the people) either just except it or we feel exhausted and depressed and do nothing to create change. We do not question the sources of this information and then we are happy with a small tidbit of good news given by the governments. Baa, baa. We are becoming sheep, with a hook leading us around; all for our own good of course!
With most of the world being hooked up with technology and information, like we have never seen in the past, what a powerful tool. I would like us the people to use those tools to limit the negative and focus on the positive. Unfortunately most of us focus on the bad or we just switch of and isolate ourselves either physically or mentally.
I believe we need to become our own advocates and limit the amounts of pre-package biased based information we absorb. We need for our own self survival to focus our intentions on a positive belief system; I am not saying put your head in the sand and not be informed. I am saying be selective and know the info source you are tuning into, know who owns them and what their affiliations are, because that effects the info being supplied.
Become focused on self empowerment and lose the sheep mentality.
What we put out, will be our primary focus point, so why choose to focus only on the bad and ugly. The choice is yours, all I ask if that you at least think about it.

Namaste
Debra Rae

Remembrance

Yesterday was Remembrance Day and I shed tears as normal when I watched the stories of young lives lost in service, so that we can have our freedom. It was refreshing to see that the young generation was present in numbers. I sometimes wonder whether the concept of individual freedom is some think thought about today, especially in a country like Canada were only around 60% of the population that can vote actually bother to do so.
  It seems to me that there is a lack of connection  felt, between our armed forces that fight aboard now days and the concept that this is providing us with personal freedom in Canada. Apathy is alive and well! It is not just a fluke that countries like Canada, USA, Australia, New Zealand and England have never had battles for freedom against other countries on their own soils. Those who stand tall and proud in the face of tyrants with the blood of their own are sending out a powerful message of Freedom and Hope.
  Today as I view all of those who are fighting aboard and coming back with scars both visible and internal, I do wonder whether they feel that they are fighting for freedom and hope. I do not know the stats for the Canadian Forces that return to private life's and do not find support for their injuries but I believe it is on the high side. I have seen enough reports out of the USA that places as high as 60% of returning soldiers being homeless and unemployed with no resources to help them with any problems from being of service. Shame on those in power that allow this to happen. What message are we sending out their: fight, give your life and sanity but tough.
   I watch the politicians and visible rich and arrogant who stand for these freedoms but only if it lines there own pockets and think to myself :"has it always been this way". Personal rewards to a few at the cost of thousands who die! Is it needed or is it a power play on a Nation level with the young and poor being the pawns. Is this why our men, women and children  have given their life's for?
  I watch the group's out there bandy around many reasons why/not we should send in our forces to other countries and I wonder what are their intentions? Are they really stating opinions with the regard to freedom being at the forefront or do they have their own addenda's?
  My belief is that we need to provide those who are willing to give their life's for us to have the freedom to have choice.  Then we should be less passive and more pro-active in what our government and those in power are allowed to do. Those of us who bask in the freedom provided by the loss of others should do more than give a minute of silence once a year. Whether we lobby for our service men and women or volunteer at a center or Vote; It does not matter the what, it is being engaged and pro-active that does.

 To all that have given of themselves so that I may sit here and write the above, my thanks is not enough But I give it anyway as it is something, and given with respect and honor. I salute you.


Just a thought
Blessings Be
Debra rae
 

Help is this the new world for our kids

I find it unsettling that parents of young children seem to view their offspring as small adults or equals. Have I missed out on that memo? the one that states that your children can participate in adult decision making or better yet make the rules that govern both them and others around them. I mean it is not like young children have underdeveloped brains or emotions and actually need to be taught. I find it incredible that people learn more about raising a pet that they do to raising a child. There seems to be a lacking of any common sense bustling around, it takes more than food and shelter too bringing up a child.
The concept of applying boundaries, having rules and actually being a disciplinarian - heavens above- that means you have to be present constantly in your child's life- now that does not seem to be something many parents at this time seem capable of. Harsh, yes, but that is how I am seeing it. We are in a time where children are being handed pills for ADD and Autism is at the highest level in our history, and behavioural problems are through the roof. I do not believe that parenting issues are the route of all of the problems we are seeing BUT I do believe it is a participant.
I am trained in Early Childhood development and also have been educated as a councillor on top I am a mother and so I do no from experience what I am talking about around bringing up children. It seems that kids are being allowed to self regulate their behaviours and their diets and that boundaries are not present. Parents are busy I get that, I was and so was my husband But you have to make your child a priority. That at times means having and sticking to rules and having expectations that your child will listen and do what you ask of them.

   Now I no you are thinking I am down of parents - you would be wrong- I am down on the system that we are living our lives to. We are forced because of the economy to have to have both parents in the workforce often working more than one job. Food, gas, cars and shelter currently cost more than ever before and most people are considered to be in the working poor or a couple of pay cheques away from the streets. For alot of people family support is either not there or too far away to be of benefit. Child care is marginal in most countries in the fact that it is usually a baby sister who places the child in front of a T.V. or computer or a under paid over worked trained care provider who is tired. Values and discipline are deemed old fashion or abuse. The irony of that is that child porn and sexual abuse is on the rise and parents who care and set boundaries are often judged and ridiculed today as bad parents.
  What I want to know is when did we vote in the government to be the provider of how we bring up our children. Really the schools are a mess. the government is not working properly and the child protective services are a laugh. Now if they the government wanted to tell big business to stop poisoning our children and us by putting who knows what in our foods then great. If they wanted to enforce strong sentencing against those who have put the family of today in a financial nightmare, I am all for it. But I am a dreamer.
  Parents today in alot of ways are blind. They have no idea on how to raise a child because they where never taught, either because of lack of parents or because of the break down in the family unit and the failure of society as a whole to fill the void. Why are their not common sense parenting classes provided free to anyone having a child, why is not the reality of having a baby taught in every class in high school. Why is not free child care provided and good wages given so that parents do not have to work many jobs for the basics needed. Why do we not have loving proactive non judgmental but FIRM rules out there that make sense and allow children the freedom of being a child with no real worries and understanding that rules are their for their safety and that teachers and parents and adults that give respect earn respect back. That it is OK for them-the child-to push the boundaries and rules but no is no for a good reason and their are real consequences to not listening and doing.
  We - society- need to rethink, re look and redo this current system because in most cases it is not working and we are letting a overindulged,under disciplined and selfish generation full of prescribed drugs and behaviours lose- not a great picture but one that we can change if we care to.